Everything of the last weeks has been focused on today. Joining a choir has been one of the most gentle, healing and important choices I have made for myself in the last six months. Every week's practice has been the place to relax, cry, laugh and connect. I sometimes feel like I live my life as an … [Read more...]
Connection
If you are like me, you look for things that you associate with your child. Symbols, objects, anything that closes the gap between here and there just a little. First, I had a painting made. I had a vision of a fun loving boy riding on a shooting star in the sky above me. He was always going to be … [Read more...]
You Are Me
and I am You. The source of our pain might be different, but our hearts ache. The missing is real, your feelings are real, your pain is real. I hear you, I hear you when you speak and I hear you when you are quiet and within yourself. I see you, I see you pull back when the conversation gets too … [Read more...]
Relationships
My father called today. He said it has been a month since we have spoken. He asked about my health, and I get surprised when he does that because there is nothing wrong with my physical health. He uses the specific vocabulary as if referring to my physical well being, but actually asking about my … [Read more...]
His Name
I guess I chose his name at the time he died. Not at the very moment, even though the moment he died plays in my head over and over... my body let me know, I just was not ready to listen, so my body decided to ignore it too... for a while I lived a happy life with a dead baby inside, with all the … [Read more...]
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